Irvan Rizqullah Fikardi
M. Nurfitriansyah
Wiladatika
First of all,
We’d like to thank our beloved english teacher for giving this
assignment, our parents because they’re giving us permissions to go to do this
assignment, and friends who have supported us. This conversation story is just
based on everyday life, but we added a lot of random things into this
conversation. After reading this maybe you will be wandering why do we make
this conversation like this ? because creating a conversation with “hello” “hi”
“how are you” “I’m fine thanks, and you” are just too mainstream and sounded
unnatural. So we added some spices to make it more… rainbow-ish, if you know
what I mean. Well we hope you enjoy the story about a man who works as an arms
dealer spending his leisure time by coming to the bar Café that he
regulary visited in his free time.
Also, in
this conversation we have 4 characters :
- Man
named ivan (Irvan Rizqullah Fikardi)
-
Bartender* named Ryan (Muhammad Nurfitriansyah)
- Girl #1
(Eva Fitriananda)
- Girl #2
(Wiladatika)
“RANDOM”
One day, there's a man coming into a cafe. That man is just a
normal man, he's not a superhero or ninjas or maybe a president, just an
arms dealer. anyway this man is just enjoying his free time to go to a
cafe, nothing very serious going to happen like there's a bomb exploding
or skyscrapers sized lizard destroying the city, just a peaceful man
walking into a cafe.
(man enters the cafe)
Man : well whassap everybody here today wooho !
Bartender : Ivan my friend !!
Man : Ryan my Mate !
Bartender : hi man ! where have you been, you haven’t showed up a
while here ?
Man : oh yeah, just got back from Afghan, just doing some business
with the boys there, and osama for sure.
Bartender : sounds great, a beer I mean glass of water
would be good for celebrating that
Man : (sitting) a glass of water ? pfft, that was lame. Gimme your
best vodka I mean soda, and mix
it with
lemon mart.. juice I mean lemonade.
Bartender : huh ? are you
serious, well that was awkward for you to ordering that kind of drinks, well if you say so.. ( then
he start to mixing the drink) by the way my friend, why do you order these
light beverages. I thought I heard you’re about to order vodka and martini
Man : well, it’s because the kid who write the dialogue was still underage and
he thinks adding stuff like alcohol into his conversation assignment would be a
bad.. bad idea when his teacher read that.
Bartender : oh I see, so the script writer was still a kid ?
Man : he’s a teenager, and back in his country alcohol was illegal
and banned. ahh y' know high schoolers.
Bartender : ooh yeah, heard that too. So what are you going to
do next ?
Man : just gimme the lemon mixed vodka I mean juice. The script
supposed to make me go to that 2 seat over there and flirt some girls, but…
that would be an inappropriate things to be added to the script. So he changed
the story, the girls will come to us and we will have an conversation.
Bartender : yeah man.. beat me to it, it'll be awesome if you could get those girls.
(Girls 1&2 coming in to the bar I mean café, and sit to
the seat that the man mention)
Man : buenas
noches señorita, guten abend schönen Damen, Selamat malam
nona-nona, オヤスミナサイ
(4 language TL : good evening). Y’all lookin good in that outfit tonight, how do you do
girls ?
Girls 1&2 : (speechless moment to give some dramatic
effect) . . .
Girl 1 : first of all, I don’t even know you… who are
you ? do you know him (to girl 2) ?
Girl 2 : nuh uh… free memory
Man : ehh.. here read this *showing this conversation
text*
Girls 1 & 2 ( nodding ) ooh I see.
Girl 2 : (clears throat) oh hi… oh my god, long time no see, I forget
when we last meet
Girl 1 ; he he me too… so where have you been ?
Man : I was just back from afghanistan doing some
business trip.
Girl 1 : oh that’s great what kind business did you do
there.
Man : I just offer the insurgents in there with explosives
i mean potatoes yes potatoes and other kind of vegetable like broccoli and
eggplant yeah like that. Just some unharmful thing won’t be bad.
Girl 2 : ah yeah… yeah yeah I heard that on the news
too, they’re in agricultural crisis right now. So what’s your job ?
Man : arms dealer.. I mean vegetable dealer, I work at
international vegetable distribution company.
Girl 1 : whow it sounds pretty serious
Girl 2 : I know… that kind of company usually pretty
famous, so if you’re going to afghan, there must be another country that you’ve
ever visited in your business trip.
Man : yeah.. Uganda, zimbabwe, bosnia, Somalia, chili,
palestine, Syria, north korea, tasmania, Iraq,
and philipine. You could say that our company pretty famous for the
peoples there.
Girl 2 : for what ?
Man : Military arsenal.. I mean vegetables.
Bartender : here is your vodka sorry I mean lemon
juice.. and girls, what do you want to drink.
Girl 1 : ginger juice mixed with durian please.
Girl 2 : mineral water please.
Bartender : ok coming right up.
Man : what do we talk last time ?
Girl 2 : your job
Man : ohh yeah… so what are you doing right now ?
Girl 1 : oh me… I work for interpol
Man : haha… I take that as a joke.
Girl 2 : no.. she really mean it, she’s an interpol.
Man : oh ok and yooooou ? you mustn’t very far from that
Girl 2 : nah.. I was just working for intelligent
Man : oh that’s great I mean it… that badge over there
seems legit.
Girl 1 : of course it is.
Bartender : your drinks are ready girls, drink it while it's still hot.
Man : oh yes drink that, ryan, i..i'm leaving, do you accept mastercard ?
Bartender : mm.. mm.. no
Man : HSBC ?
Bartender : no
Man : VISA ?
Bartender : no
Man : Paypal ?
Bartender : what th.. no
Man : BNI Syariah ?
Bartender : no
Man : Mandiri ?
Bartender : no
Man : BCA ?
Bartender : no
Man : Bank Kalbar ?
Bartender : just name all bank you’ve got, i don’t
accept card, cash only.. duh
Man : WHY DON’T you say that from earlier ! how much is
it
Bartender : 36
Man : here
Bartender : I'm not finished yet... 360 pounds
Man : the bloody *peeep
Bartender : "Soda’s" quite expensive nowadays.
Man : yeah right, take it, take it all.
Bartender : that’s just for the drinks, how about my
tips, i've got kids too you know ?
Man : here... it’s been a great chat with
you girls, bye !
Girls 1&2 : bye, see you soon..
(few minutes later)
Girl 1 : he’s a funny guy.. what do he said ? vegetable dealer hahaha
Girl 2 : yeah I thought he said that he was an arms
dealer…
… (more pause for dramatic effect)
Girl 1 : call the agencies, we just let a category 1 international threat slipped of our hands. tell the MI6 to look for him
Gilr 2 : on it.. (calling 110)
Then,
the man was captured right when he about to leave england to france. he
was then convicted for supporting numerous genocide in the africa and
IED in afghanistan, 2 months later he was confirmed executed by the
british goverment.
~fin~
IF YOU ARE STILL CONFUSED WITH THE STORY PLEASE READ THE FAQ
FAQ – Frequently Asked Questions
Q : Your
story is just basically a complete joke, why do you create this anyway ?
A : Well we are the one who make this
story so we do what we like, besides there’s expression in this dialogue anyway
Q : Why there’s a bartender in a café,
wasn’t it supposed to be an steward or waitress ?
A : well… the bartender is the café
owner’s brother so he have a complete access
to do whatever he want in his brother’s bar, trust me it’s a long story.
Q : How do the bartender knew the man ?
A : the man usually comes to his bar, it's a long
story.
Q : Why from thousands of other job, why
do you make the man worked as an arms dealer, why don’t you just give him
another jobs like he’s a superman or batman or spiderman or another awesome job ?
A
: Because I just watched a movie about
arms dealer last night, it's called "Lord of war" if you've ever heard
of that, good movie though. if I watch “the incredible hulk” or
“spiderman III”
last night it would’ve been a different story.
Q :
Why the story take place in a bar I mean café ? and why the story turned
out to be a bit irrational and crazy.
A : Inspirations always comes when you’re
not expecting it, especially the crazy ones, true story.
Q : Wouldn’t you afraid your teacher will
give you a low score on this assignment ?
A : nope, i'm pretty confidence with this story.
Q : why are you creating this FAQ page anyway
?
A
: because i don't want the reader to think that the creator of this
story is too stupid or lack of imagination to create a normal story.
Q : I don’t get it in the part the man
shows the conversation page to the girls.
A : that part. The girls recognized that
they must continue the conversation like what was written in the script.
